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The blog banner was made with elements from Lorie Davison. The nail head is Mo Jackson, the white rabbit and the key is Tangie Baxter. The butterflies are from Katie Pertiet.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

She Flies Through The Air

...with the greatest of ease.
This must be what Hyacinth Hippo felt like in Fantasia.


That's what I was thinking.

Right before,

"Holy cow!  This is REALLY gonna hurt!"

and then

"$KJ%LK@#JKL@#$JK@L#"

Boom.

Good.  I've stopped.

Wait!

No!

No.

No we aren't stopping!!!

Yup.

I'm going to hit that concrete with my face.

My teeth broke my fall.
Luckily, my teeth did not break.
But,
let me tell you.
They hurt.


And I was not smiling.



And now I'm laying face down here.
But instead of noticing
"Wow.  We really need to scrape and paint that trim on the door."

It looked more like this:


After assessing the damage done to my body.
I ascertained if I could actually get up and make it back inside.
My husband works nights and he was upstairs getting ready to leave.
If I was laying on the concrete in the back he wouldn't notice it.
He'd assume that I was next door at my neighbor Susan's house.
I had to get myself back inside.
I'm telling you.
I HURT!!
And my foot was bleeding.
I busted my lip.
Scraped my cheek.
Because.
Because I tripped off of this!

A six inch stoop!!
A child can step off of a six inch stoop
and not injure him or herself.
Not me.
All I wanted to do was take some photos
of a pair of earrings I had made.
One trip and
I'm flying through the air.
It was a lovely swan dive.
And my first thought was-

 I wanted to protect my beloved camera.

So I twisted my body to cradle it's fall.
I came down hard on my knees and side 
and then smacked my face full force
into the concrete.

Good news.

The camera
is fine!


My right foot is fine.
My ankle is sprained a bit.
But my left foot?
Well, let's just say that
any chances I may have had
of being a foot model
are over.

I wrapped my poor bleeding foot up in a towel.
I headed to the couch to lie down.
I had my leg sticking straight up in the air.
You know.
To elevate it higher than my heart.
I'm crying.
I hurt.
I'm humiliated (because it was STUPID)
My face is scraped.
My lips are swollen.

And,
I look like someone wailed the tar OUT OF ME!

Now.
Hold that picture in your head a moment.


WHEN
my husband went upstairs to get ready for work
he left me in the kitchen washing dishes.

The next time he sees me
just a short 30 minutes later.

I'm laying on the couch.
A blood soaked towel is on my foot.
The visual I just gave you is before him.

He stands and looks at me.
Incredulous!
It must've been a sight.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?!!!!"

So.

What would you do, if your husband asked you?


11 comments:

Mac n' Janet said...

I would tell him that "I" had happened to me because I'm the clumsiest person in the world and he knows it!

The Copper Pot said...

Kathy, I'm sorry you got hurt but this post made me crack up, especially the blurry photo. BTW, I stopped and got the earrings at my mom's and I LOVE them. Thank you :) Thank you also for the second pair. That wasn't neccessary but I certainly appreciate it :)

see mary stamp said...

Poor Kathy - I was really hoping when I read the title of your blog post that it wasn't you who went flying through the air. As someone who freqently breaks her toes simply from stubbing them and who has taken more than a few swan dives, my sympathies. Feel better soon!

P.S. I think I'd have told my hubby I was mugged by a flash mob. :-)

Rebecca said...

Oh Kathy, I hope you are healing up fast and nothing else is hurt!
Men... they really can be annoying.
Oh, I don't know dear, I was doing the dishes and the sink came up and slapped me in the face and then dropped on my foot.
I sometimes think of all the stupid things I have done to get a display up at the shop and shudder, it could have been sooo bad.
Wishing you a quick recovery and a good weekend.
PS I put on well over 4000 miles this trip, I am going to have to cool it, that car has to last another couple of years.
Blessings
Rebecca

Suz said...

That is funny...but I am so sorry, too. Is it ok if I am laughing and very sad for you at the same time??
Hug,
Suz

Into Vintage said...

Did you have that moment where you're on the ground and suddenly you realize just how long it's been since you've fallen down?!

I'm just guessing of course.

Take care friend. And see you next fall. ;-0 (I'm sorry - deep down I'm nine years old)

Cameron said...

Did he really need to ask.....I've read your soldering iron stories :)

I'm so sorry...you must be pretty bruised up today! Take it easy for a while....maybe Hubby will take over dish washing duties for now :)

Beth Leintz said...

Oh my gosh, I hurt just thinking about a fall like that on concrete- and I think my reaction would have been the same- "MUST SAVE THE CAMERA"

SummersStudio said...

You poor thing. Hope everything is feeling better today.

Terri Kahrs said...

First . . . . thank your lucky stars and your guardian angel that you're still in one piece -- a little battered and bruised, but still in one hurting piece!!! Oh, you poor Darling!!! I feel for you as I do NOT have a reputation for being a gazelle or graceful. And, if it makes you feel any better, I'd have worried about saving my camera too!!!! Hope that it doesn't hurt when you laugh!!!! You WILL dance again!!!! Love & Hugs, Terri xoxo

Pansy Cottage Girl said...

Just another dish towel drama honey, you know the usual!

Im so glad you are ok. So you were doing dishes and what happened? How did you end up outside? JK

XO~